You’re a stay at home mom, how could you possibly be anything other than thrilled? I mean, you get to stay home with your kids all day wearing yoga pants and you don’t have to go to work! So, life’s a piece of cake, right? Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. Sure, there are days when being a stay at home mom is amazing, many of them in fact, but it’s all too easy to slip into the stay at home mom blues without even realizing you’re there. Whether you’re experiencing a burnout from the day-to-day routine, depression due to seclusion from the outside world or boredom in general, here are some tips for overcoming the stay at home mom blues.
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Tips for Overcoming the Stay at Home Mom Blues
Acknowledge the problem
During my time as a stay at home mom, I’ve had some variation of the stay at home mom blues a few times. The problem was, I didn’t acknowledge it. I was so busy trying to keep it all together and get everything done that I didn’t take a moment to realize that I wasn’t okay. In the back of my mind, I knew something was up, but as they say, the first step is always admitting when you have a problem.
If life seems harder than usual lately, take a moment to acknowledge where you are at. Are you feeling depressed or anxious? Are you exhausted every day? Being a mom is hard work, and of course, it will wear you out, but there is a difference between being worn out from chasing your toddler around and being completely lethargic and unmotivated. Recognize where you are and say it out loud to someone if you can.
Tip: This is where journaling comes in handy. I find that when I’m writing in a journal daily, I tend to practice self-reflection more often and more honestly. I’ll often catch problems earlier on because I’ve processed them in my journal.
Accept the problem
Okay, you’ve acknowledged that you’re burnt out, unmotivated, maybe even slightly depressed, but what now? You may even feel worse just thinking about it! Now that you know where you stand, it’s time to accept it. No, I don’t mean that you’re not going to do anything about it, but you need to accept it as a reality.
Accept that you feel the way you feel and remove the guilt. You are not a bad mom for not enjoying every moment with your children. You are not a bad wife for not enjoying every moment of homemaking. And you are not less than because you are suffering from the stay at home mom blues. Not only are these feelings perfectly normal and unbelievably common, they are also just that, YOUR feelings. Guilt is one of the hardest emotions to overcome. When you combine it with how you are currently feeling, it weighs you down and makes it significantly harder to get back on your feet.
Make a decision
It’s time to decide exactly what needs to change and to make a conscious decision to change it. Here’s the key, it has to be for you. Not for your kids, not for your spouse, for YOU. I know, you’re a mom, and it feels selfish to look at it this way, but chances are, one of the reasons you have the stay at home mom blues in the first place is because you weren’t thinking about yourself enough!
Make the decision to take care of yourself FOR yourself. If you do it for someone else, you’ll only be hitting the bare minimum of what you actually need, just enough to complete whatever task or put on whatever happy face you need to satisfy others. When you do it for yourself, you know when you’re half-assing it. You know when you’re really happy. You can hold yourself accountable.
Do what you can
Take action! Obviously, the action you take will depend on your unique situation, but here are a few things that are likely to be beneficial for just about anyone suffering from the stay at home mom blues:
- Get in a daily workout – Even if it’s just 15 minutes of cardio before the kids get up, do it!
- Watch your diet – Healthy blood sugar levels help with mood and energy.
- Get out of the house – Staying inside for days on end will make anyone a little loony.
- Take a break – Get someone to watch the kiddos while you do something YOU want to do.
- Get ready – Get dolled up, even without a reason to. You’ll get an instant self-esteem boost!
- Simplify – We often overcomplicate things in life. Find ways to simplify your daily routine.
- Do something creative – Creativity puts your mind in a different place.
- Mix it up – Change up your day in some new way. Remember, when you’re a stay at home mom, you have the freedom to do whatever you like! There’s no boss restricting where you can go or what you can do all day. Take a mini day trip with the kids to a new place, try out that new museum across town, or explore nature with them!
Ask for help if it doesn’t work
If you still can’t seem to get rid of the stay at home mom blues, ask for help. Help can come in many forms. Maybe it’s sending the kids to grandma’s for a couple of days so you can reset. Or if you think you may need to talk to a doctor, by all means, do. At the very least, ask for the support of those closest to you. Whether that be emotional support, help with the kids, or help with your other household responsibilities, a little help goes a long way.
Whatever you do, don’t struggle silently. You’d be surprised how supportive people will be when you confide in them. Sure, there are some people out there who can’t get past themselves enough to support others, but the majority of people want to help. They just need you to tell them how they can.
What do you do when you get the stay at home mom blues? What snaps you out of it?? Let me know in the comments below!
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